Remember Weebles, those egg-shaped toddler toys with a weighted base in the 1970s?
“Weebles wobble but they don’t fall down,” was their silly slogan.
After more than 30 years as a sedentary writer, I have turned into a Weeble, a short, AARP card-carrying Weeble, right down to the weighted bottom.
Consequently, I made a big decision.
No, I didn’t go on a diet or sign up for a seniors’ aerobics class — I bought a pair of Spanx (an undergarment designed to shape, smooth and make you look thinner).
When I opened the bag, I pulled out what appeared to be a leotard for a Barbie doll.
I checked the tag and the size was correct, so I attempted to put it on.
I bent, twisted, squeezed, jumped up and down and worked up a good sweat. By the time I got the Spanx on, I had lost five pounds.
It did make me look thinner!
In an unrelated observance, I’m having difficulty keeping pills in my mouth long enough to swallow.
I put a pill on my tongue, pick up a glass of water and the pill falls out of my mouth!
I’m like, “What on earth is wrong with me?”
This happens again and again.
The same goes for spilling food on my clothes.
I used to be a very neat eater, but once again, my mouth isn’t in sync with the rest of my body or my hand isn’t steady. I’m not sure which.
Hubby said it couldn’t be my mouth.
“As much as you talk, your mouth should be in great shape,” he said.
Haha! That Hubby thinks he’s a comedian, but he’s not!
It appears that even the mailman is against me.
As my time on earth moves ever closer to 65 years, he leaves me a daily deluge of mail.
No, not fan mail — Medicare mail.
I can’t stand it and don’t know how to stop it.
Seems everybody wants to help me choose a plan or wants to sell me on their particular plan. They claim to have the best plan, the most popular plan or a plan that fits my budget.
It’s Medicare madness!
If you ask me, it’s a very confusing way to get insurance and God knows I need insurance. I think I pulled a muscle struggling with my Spanx!
Shelley Terry believes when life’s little ups and downs go mostly down, a good chuckle always helps.