By SHELLEY TERRY - firstname.lastname@example.org
We’re going bananas at the Terry Farm.
Hubby is busy in the basement cooking up a big batch of banana wine.
Yes, you read right, banana wine.
Faithful readers may recall that Hubby is a award-winning wine maker, taking home two first-place ribbons last year from the Ashtabula County Fair. The judges loved his homemade pineapple and strawberry wines.
Now, he’s going to try his hand at banana wine.
Consequently, last week he sent me to Aldi’s to buy bananas, where bananas were on sale for 29 cents per pound.
I thought he said, “Buy eight pounds.”
He said he said, “Buy 30 pounds.”
On Wednesday, I purchased eight pounds of bananas.
Thursday morning he said, “That’s not enough. Please go buy more.”
Now, readers, do you know how many bananas make 30 pounds? It’s a lot of bananas.
I go to Aldi’s, gather up a huge box of bananas and who do I run into in the fruit aisle? Hubby!
He was wheeling along a cart full of bananas.
“What are you doing here?” I said.
“Buying bananas,” he said.
“You told me to buy more bananas,” I said.
“I decided to buy them myself,” he said.
And so on and so on ...
We go up to the check-out line with two carts of ripe bananas.
People are starting to stare at us.
I feel compelled to explain to complete strangers why we are buying so many bananas, but just as I open my mouth, Hubby says, “My wife has a pet monkey!”
I am stunned.
“I do not!” I said.
The strangers chuckle as Hubby continues to tell everyone about my pet monkey.
“Really, I don’t have a monkey,” I said. “He’s going to make banana wine.”
I don’t know if anyone believed me, but afterwards, I thought of what I should have said, “I have a monkey — his name is (Hubby).”
Be sure to visit the Ashtabula County Fair this year to see if Hubby’s banana wine won a blue ribbon. You might find staff writer Shelley Terry sipping on a banana-flavored milkshake.