‘Wildest West’ fun play, unusual grub

By MARGIE TRAX PAGE - Staff Writer - mtrax@starbeacon.com
Star Beacon

May 07, 2008 07:43 pm

— GENEVA-ON-THE-LAKE — Nothing says happy birthday like a dinner of sheep testicles and rattlesnake, but that is what I found myself eating at my husband’s 28th birthday dinner as we laughed our way through six courses of interesting eats and a really great show.
The Wildest West Show at the Oak Room at Geneva-on-the-Lake featured a sparkling cast of unforgettable characters and a truly unforgettable menu.
This bit of dinner theater with a shoot-’em up twist opens with Penelope Perfect, a little lady who ventures to the little town of Big Gulp to meet the father she never knew.
But the recent death of old man Perfect leaves Penelope easy prey to the villainous Fargo Wells and his dastardly plans to steal the Perfect farm for his new railroad.
But there is a new sheriff in town. Sheriff Chase Courtwright and his trusty Indian sidekick Tanveer will try to save the day for Penelope in this back-to-the-saloon story.
The first course on the “Grub List” was bean dip and salsa with fresh tortilla chips during happy hour. I ordered a rum and Coke that kicked like the chuckwagon mule. Someone else in the audience ordered a tall glass of water, to which the barmaid yelled “Hey girls, do we serve water in this here saloon?”
“Heeelllll NO!” they yelled back.
Now the dinner theatre opens with Fargo Wells played by Rollin Michael, who looked very much like Johnny Cash in his black cowboy getup. Maureen Tanner took the stage as the sultry songstress Lacey Lamour and Heather Johnson and Sarah Cantrell play the boot-scooting barmaids April and May Calendar. The girls did a great rendition of the Dixie Chick’s song “Sin Wagon,” complete with a lot of jumping up and down on the Oak Room bar.
The girls served up plates of Mesa Maracas. With that one potent rum and Coke in me, I squinted at the menu in the darkly-lit Oak Room. Mesa Maracas, hummn? The only description on the menu was Rocky Mountain oysters. Still, in the dark the heavily breaded appetizer looked like fried liver.
I turned to the lady next to me and asked the inevitable question.
“They say they are steer testicles, but I think they are really sheep testicles,” she said.
Oh. Now my husband was grinning from ear to ear. “Go ahead,” he said. “Make my birthday: Eat it!”
I closed my eyes and took one little bite. The chewy texture of the meat wasn’t much different than liver or veal, but I knew what I was eating and the lady next to me knew what I was eating. No matter how you bread them, balls are balls.
My husband ate all of his and all of mine. He has a sophisticated palate.
“I don’t know what the big deal is,” he said.
The lady next to me wasn’t so brave. She picked up her fork and cut a piece in half.
“I’m not going to eat it, I am just going to make it look like I ate it,” she said.
Once we got past that delicacy we chowed on some very tasty chicken gumbo before our course of rattlesnake crabcakes, which really tasted just like crabcakes.
The show sparkled with fun and humor, most notably with Brook Collin Hall’s portrayal of the spur-clanking, pants-hitching, altogether smitten Sheriff Chase Courtwright. Laura Lagania’s virtuous, doe-eyed space cadet Penelope Perfect lent some more fun to the show.
By far the vocal performance of the night belonged to Laura and Collin for the duet “Come What May” with lovely vocals and hilarious body language.
If the show was stolen, it was taken by Tristan Kujanpaa as the Indian (read: Muslim) guide Tanveer Ghandharva. In one hilarious medley of songs, Tristan, with a very straight face, sang “Home on the range, where the beer and the cantaloupe play” and then broke out in MC Hammer and polka that made me cry belly-hugging tears of laughter.
The cast got together for the song “Water,” led by Hall and Michael, another great moment of the night.
Tina Burgett was the anchor of the show with her Madame Margaret Moore, a saloon and parlor owner with a smart mouth and sassy attitude. Burgett kept the sometimes unruly storyline on track and steered the cast with a solid performance.
I would be remiss if I didn’t mention Bruce Call and his absolutely dead-on funny Cookie the chuckwagon cook. Hat crooked and limping after his burning beans, Call was a consistent laugh throughout the meal.
The chicken and steak dinner, even the testicles, was perfectly cooked and served by the hardest working acting group in the business. These guys sang, danced, acted, tended bar, served food, ladled beans and gathered plates all night.
From the prairie potatoes to the apple dumpling and the rattlesnake in the middle, the meal and show was worth the $40 ticket. The show is long, more than three hours, but a lot of fun if you don’t have the baby-sitter waiting for your return. The show is also very clean and appropriate for most ages, though the younger children might not last through the whole show.
The Wildest West Show is done for the year, but my husband is already planning on attending the spooky “Countdown to Murder” show, which runs May 29, June 5, 12, 19, 26, and July 3 and 10. No word if testicles are on the menu.
I am looking forward to “The Cat’s Meow” dinner theater set in an old Speakeasy, which will run July 17, 24, 31, Aug. 7, 14, 21, 28.
For tickets or more information, call 1-800-518-8650 or visit www.genevalanding.com.

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